This Week's Crazy Retail Crimes Involved Mrs. Kanye West

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For reasons we might never understand, this week has been full of bizarre crime reports with a retail connection. Let's run through them, shall we?

NAME: Kanye Resa West, née Linda Resa
ALLEGED MISBEHAVIOR: Tossing an amp through the window of an Office Depot in Times Square; donning a wedding dress and performing music under the name "Mrs. Kanye West"
STATUS: Pleaded guilty to criminal mischief charges.
KARDASHIAN CONNECTION: Not a Kim fan. "I don't really like her right now," she told DNAinfo. "I think he can do better."

NAME: Dawnelle Yager, owner of boutique Soixante Neuf Jewels
ALLEGED MISBEHAVIOR: Hitting a Chinese immigrant with an umbrella over a West Village parking spot.
STATUS: Arraigned and released without bail.
KARDASHIAN CONNECTION: Kim's worn her jewelry.

NAME: Joseph Loiacono, owner of a nameless antiques store at 373 Graham Avenue in Williamsburg
ALLEGED MISBEHAVIOR: Threatening neighbors with a power saw, a knife, and a baseball bat; inspiring an anonymous blog about his behavior; yelling at DNAinfo reporter, then "belting out an operatic aria" and "offering to perform a magic trick."
STATUS: Arrested, shop closed.
KARDASHIAN CONNECTION: None, sadly.

· Crimes of Fashion [Racked NY]
· Woman Named Kanye West Faces the Music For Throwing Amp [DNAinfo]
· Williamsburg Antique Store Closed After Owner Arrested Updated [DNAinfo]