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Welcome to Drunk Shopping, our feature celebrating the time-honored tradition of getting totally wasted while the sun's still shining before buying a bunch of debatably useful stuff that the sober you would be too timid or too restrained to take home. Each Friday we'll cobble together a new itinerary starting you off with a boozy Saturday or Sunday brunch before meandering through a few neighboring retailers and happy hours notable for seasonal specials, limited time availability, fantastic deals, recent openings, or new shipments.
On holiday weekends Drunk Shopping takes to the outlets for bargains and an out-of-city buzz. It's a tradition—and we're very, very traditional. But not totally static! This holiday weekend—happy Labor Day, by the way—we're hitting a different outlet mall: The Tanger Outlets at the Arches in Deer Park, New York. Sorry, no Balenciaga, but the Arches does feature a Neiman Marcus Last Call, a Saks Fifth Avenue Off 5th, and over 80 other shops including Wolford, Betsey Johnson, Lucky Brand Jeans and Kate Spade.
Better yet, there's a Saturday farmer's market with Long Island-grown and produced edibles, a sidewalk sale, and the 1st Annual Taste of Tanger BBQ and Grilling Cookoff which will pair amateur Long Island grillmasters with chef Nilka Hendricks of Hell's Kitchen fame as well as locally renown chef, radio personality and cookbook author Tom Schaudel. Besides raffles and demos, the winner of the weekend's barbecue cook-off will represent New York state at a national grilling competition in Kansas City. And, hey, if it's hot: There's a Regal Cinemas and a whole bunch of pretty terrible summer movies. Bring booze and relish the possibility that suburban movie theaters might host fewer bedbugs.
Grab a bagel, a bottle of something, and a bottle of something stronger to pour into your first bottle of something. Then get to Penn Station. The LIRR has a package all ready for you: Round trip train fare to Deer Park, an Arches shuttle bus and a monster coupon book for $19.
The mall may be different but the rules stay the same: Wear something amazing! New Yorkers in suburban malls and/or being a New Yorker in a suburban mall are really only hilarious when said New Yorkers really dress the part. And keep your strength and your stamina with a big, greasy, delicious meal. There's a Miller's Ale House on site and their menu of giant cheese-topped salads and juicy burgers is exactly what you'd expect. And on Sundays there are $2 beers. It's Labor Day—you have to drink beer.
Enjoy! And please do share your Drunk Shopping tips, tales, and war stories in the comments.