A Fourth of July Escape for Irresponsible Spending, American-style

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Welcome to Drunk Shopping, our feature celebrating the time-honored tradition of getting totally wasted while the sun's still shining before buying a bunch of debatably useful stuff that the sober you would be too timid or too restrained to take home. Each Friday we'll cobble together a new itinerary starting you off with a boozy Saturday or Sunday brunch before meandering through a few neighboring retailers and happy hours notable for seasonal specials, limited time availability, fantastic deals, recent openings, or new shipments.

Oh hey! Holiday weekend! Happy Fourth! Beer us! But, in the off chance sitting outside and sipping suds in a collapsible chair gets old after a day or three—take your buzz to the outlets. Yes, we did just kind of do this for Memorial Day, we know!

But, listen, the deals are too good to pass up. And maybe it'll become a tradition that each holiday weekend we'll skip out on the City and head to Woodbury Commons Premium Outlets in Central Valley, New York for Drunk Shopping revelry. It sure is a tempting plan.

Be all that as it may, the drill remains the same. Hop the Gray Line bus bound for Woodbury Commons at the Port Authority. Buses leave about once an hour and a round trip ticket is $42. Pack your brunch and your booze—perhaps a freshly squeezed lemonade and a little tequila too? It's Independence Day after all.

In an hour or so you'll be "hiking" in "the mountains" (go with it) amongst—if we may quote ourselves—"outlet standards like Gap and Bass and Ann Taylor" along with "Balenciaga, a Barneys, a Yves Saint Laurent and even a new Marni. We're getting all tingly just writing about it." Yup, still tingly.

Everything's on sale—you're at an outlet mall. Regardless, there are some major, major deals to look out for: Spend $300 at Tory Burch and get an additional 30% off. Buy one item get one free, plus 25% off accessories, at Betsey Johnson. Selected items at Burberry are an additional 30% off; likewise at BCBG Max Azria where some discounts reach 50%. That's not crazy enough for you? 7 For All Mankind is offering 60% to 70% off select items in every department while the entire Cole Haan store is 50% off (shoelaces and suede brushes excluded).

Chloé is having a sidewalk sale! Inside, prices are 20% to 60% off almost across the board. At Dolce & Gabbana, spring '09 is an additional 40% off. For new arrivals, head to Elie Tahari where the freshest shipments are 30% off; the old stuff is up to 50% off. Went overboard with designer? Hello $10 shorts at Gap and $5 women's tanks at J.Crew!

We could list holiday deals all the live-long day, there are that many. Click to see the rest whether you're looking to buy Bose, Tag Heuer, or Yankee Candle.

You know this already, but: Pack booze. Dress fierce—part of the fun is scaring the locals and tourists while totally making the area teens working in these fancy, rural outlets swoon (one day they'll be living in New York and taking buses to high end outlets and getting wasted and looking fabulous, and they can't wait). Don't be ashamed to eat at Applebee's—fried things! A full bar! No other options! And, yeah, the last bus is at 9:26pm. Don't get stuck.

Enjoy! And please do share your Drunk Shopping tips, tales, and war stories in the comments.
· Woodbury Commons Premium Outlets [Official Site]
· Woodbury Common Premium Outlets Shopping Tour [Gray Line]
· Applebee's [Official Site]
· Drunk Shopping [Racked NY]